Another Kook Aid Overdose On MLK Jr. Day

As I surfed the racism and discrimination tag surfer I came across a post that sounded promising.  It was called The Afronista Rants #7: Sorry, MLK , The War Ain’t Over Yet.  I mean from the title and how the post starts I thought this was going to be an insightful strong view.  And all I got was disgusted and basically pissed off.  I almost wished I had not seen it, but then I wouldn’t be able to address some of the views that we have of our own.  It is pretty obvious that this person is channeling Bill Cosby or at least studies at his school of non thought.  So basically this was a reply that ran hella long so became a post instead.  So bare with me.

Wow, is this post supposed to be inspiring?  I was with you for at least a paragraph or two.  But as I read on this seems to have lapsed into nothing more than the same stereotypical tripe that is being force fed to the masses constantly with the help of Bill Cosby and the like.  You speak about the fact that the war isn’t over, and you are right at least about that one thing.

The war isn’t over, but the war isn’t with us like you think.  The last time I checked blacks weren’t holding the positions of power in which to deny jobs to other blacks.  But that is beside the point.  Let’s just go and address the articles main points, shall we.  You talk about how we oppress ourselves more than the white man ever could.  And you might be right from looking at your thoughts on the black community.  But the sad cold facts are that in the game of oppression the majority still reigns supreme.

Talking white, acting white, Uncle Tom, etc.  You claim that these are all things said to other blacks to make them feel guilty for succeeding.  Um, what?  That is a load of crap.  Acting or talking white, which I doubt very seriously is even being used as often as people like you claim, is not about people doing well.  It is about people who have a propensity to speak proper English, which by the way is no indicator of how well you are doing.  My son has just finished going to an ALL black school where he was on the honor role as well as being in honor and AP classes, and has not been called that.  I guess it may be regional.

I also, never suffered those names and neither has my significant other who was a math major and went to a school for the gifted while living in an all black neighborhood.  My sister who kept a 4.0 all through her school career has also never suffered from this form of taunting.  We lived in a black neighborhood as well.  I am not saying it doesn’t happen, but I am saying that I have talked to too many people who would definitely have been candidates for this talk who don’t know anyone suffering this as well.  Not to mention we are all successful now and live in an all black neighborhood that anyone who can see, would consider the ghetto.  And that is by choice.  And I have yet to be called anything other than neighbor.

And Uncle Tom is a whole other beast in itself.  Also, having nothing to do with how well a person “plays the game” or so called game.  It is about a black person who will sell the rest of the black community down the river to get ahead.  Now unless this is the “game” you are talking about, then maybe you are right.  But, then again if this IS the game then I would think that this would be a bad thing, deserving of some derogatory name.  You see, to a LOT of black people, we can do well AND help the black community at the same time.  Success doesn’t have to be mutually exclusive.  And maybe that is the problem.

Just because a person spots an Uncle Tom doesn’t have to mean that they somehow failed the game, or can’t play the game.  This kind of talk is just a cop out in order to justify leaving the black community in the dust in order to win at this so called “game”.  People act like they can never see pointing out these blacks is anything other than envy, jealousy or what have you.  And since it goes deeper than just the same stereotypical thoughts, you might need to think outside the box to understand.

Black people segregate themselves far worse than the Jim Crow laws.  Wow, just wow.  I guess you haven’t heard of Red lining, gentrification or discriminatory and predatory lending practices.  All of these practices were and are designed to keep the “majority” of blacks in specific areas.  But, hey, don’t let me rain on the bash black parade.  I guess all it takes for blacks to get out into those exclusively white dominated housing markets is to turn on a bit of “other people’s music”.  Because lord knows that blacks love crummy neighborhoods and choose to stay there whenever possible.

I am guessing the fact that black unemployment is over twice that of the general white dominated population is just a fluke.  I suppose, to you blacks are just a lazy bunch of do nothings who refuse to try new things.  At least this is what your writing looks like to me.  You of all people should realize that the black community is not this monolith we are generally seen as.  You have people from every walk of life who decide to ONLY stick to the music they have grown up with.  That isn’t some sort of black trait that signifies uncouth uncultured people.  You seem to have a narrow mind when looking at the black community.

Just because one is born in a middle class neighborhood doesn’t mean they need to stay there as well, and the same can be said for upper class neighborhoods too.  And what makes you think you know how much determination there is with each new generation of blacks?  I am curious to know.  And what circumstances surround these new generations who lack determination?  Or do you know or even care?  You are great at naming symptoms of this disease we in America live in, all the while seeming to gloss over or better yet ignore the facts of the actual disease.

Black people want to be rappers or sports stars?  And why would this be?  Would this be because if they turn on their televisions, radios or internet, they see that blacks, who were once relegated to those crappy neighborhoods as you put it, were able to use those means to bust out of the crappy place?   Is this a black trait; are black children the only ones who have dreams of entertainment or sports?  Because the last time I checked there were kids from every walk of life aspiring to be stars of some sort.

And I guess you don’t see the hypocrisy in your statements, right.  Either these kids have no determination and are happy wallowing in their crappy neighborhoods or are actively wanting something better or more even if they are chasing the wrong rainbow.  I guess there aren’t any props for the dream.

And black men don’t think of college, only getting it quick by selling drugs on the corner.  Again, wow.  And this isn’t stereotypical why?  I guess all of those black men who DO go to college only did so for sports.  Even though the majority of them actually major in and graduate to do something other than sports.  And I guess all those black drug dealers who are standing on the corner have hidden airplanes, speed boats or other equipment to help them import all the drugs from outside the country.

We know damn well that almost every drug sold in America comes from outside the country and people still want to claim that selling drugs is a black thing.  Are you nuts?  Cocaine isn’t grown in the U.S., so where are these drug dealers getting it in order to make crack, crank and whatever else?  Where are they getting the heroine which is made from the poppy plant and is pretty much a staple of Afghanistan right now?  You really think that black men can get away with carting drugs down from Canada or up from Mexico or in from overseas with all the racial profiling that goes on, these dudes can barely walk down the street.  And if you are ignoring this, can you say who is getting a pass on bringing the drugs to those black men?

And let’s talk more about the education.  You speak of college but somehow fail to mention all of the failing, crumbling, shoddy excuses for public schools.  Who is responsible for those schools?  Why do you think that the government would set up a system where the schools are funded by tax dollars, when we know that the majority of black neighborhoods have a tax base so low they can barely pay for a school window?  Do you think that was a coincidence?

I mean come on it isn’t rocket science!  OK, black unemployment HIGH, black income, SUPER LOW, black middle class GONE, black tax base LOW, schools in black area funded by unemployed, low income, low tax revenue equals POOR SCHOOLS WHERE KIDS DON’T HAVE A CHANCE.  So while black kids are being undereducated by the truckload; who can we say is getting a pass on this one?  If we wanted to educate every child in America, we would.  This isn’t that far a leap to make; it wouldn’t even be for some poor kid educated in a black public school.

And now January 20th is rolling around and yet the fool is ALREADY up on the soap box!  You claim that black people got all of these rights and act as if just because there are laws against discrimination, all of a sudden bingo bongo the doors flung open and blacks were ushered inside.  You know there are laws against murder too, do I need to go on. You speak of reparations and people knocking on our doors to hand us our due.  Well the last time I checked I didn’t get a dime of freaking reparations and no one is banging on my door to give me neither reparations nor this supposed due, you spoke of.

But what I do know is that black people today aren’t, this monolithic poor ghetto population who refuse to leave our squalor ridden crummy neighborhoods, while ignoring our education as we refuse to do anything besides sell drugs all while dreaming of being the next super rapping sports sensation who doesn’t want to listen to the Beach boys for fear someone somewhere will call us a white talking and acting, Uncle Tom.

I hate to say it as well, but we are losing the war.  The war we are losing is the one where even our fellow black people can’t seem to fight the programming which says we are all just that one big raging black drug dealing ghetto thug who is out to ruin America by begging for a hand out.  It is a shame when we have such hatred or disdain for our own community that we can’t even see that we have taken up the bell of the town crier.  One whose bell is so much stereotypical crap that once was heaped on us by a white dominant community town crier.

Hopefully as your buddies continue to send you statements about how they are black and proud, you can look at yourself and see someone who should be a proud black person yet isn’t because you allowed yourself to get drunk off the Kook aid spiked with propaganda fed to you by the dominant community.  Hopefully you will realize that you are no better than those ghetto folks you seem to hate. Those ghetto folk may be tearing the black community down with their ignorance and complacency.

But unfortunately, you are nothing more than their twisted doppelganger. You think you have made it, are making your way to it or some version there of.  Yet, you do nothing to help the black community with this stereotypical rant. Actually you are working hard and seeming to be very successful at tearing the black community down.  And the one thing that unites you with Mr. and Mrs. Ghetto in all of your destruction of the black community is blatant ignorance.  And to think the title of the blog is “Senseless Scribbling Of An Idiot.”  Kudos, sounds like you finally hit the nail right square on the head with that one.



Filed under African American, Black community, Black Culture, Martin Luther King, Propaganda, Racism, Subjugation

12 responses to “Another Kook Aid Overdose On MLK Jr. Day

  1. Excellent. Debate inspired, and not without merit.

    However, I believe that when people write, they write from their own experiences. I am not an expert on blackpeopleness (to make up my own word), just your average idiot paying attention what is going on within my immediate surroundings.

    I am a black person who grew up abroad, then spent some time in a largely minority area (not black) in the U.S. In my adulthood, I moved to a city with a large black population. Since I didn’t know any black people outside of my family, I didn’t have any preconceived notions of what I thought black people ought to be.

    To my knowledge, I had never experienced racism until I moved to this area. That doesn’t mean it didn’t happen behind my back or on paper, or what have you, but it did happen in my face by another black person. Your family is lucky that you fit in so well in your community and no one has ever accused you of being too white, sounding white or being an Uncle Tom.

    My rant, is just that, a rant, a personal one at that. Perhaps there are too many generalisations, but since I’m not an expert, I can only work based on what I have experienced–just as you have. If this is all that I see, what precisely am I supposed to think about our race? For me, only the stereotypes apply.

  2. ischeherazade,

    I understand full well that everyone has their personal experience with racism which is one of the reasons I said that I can’t say it doesn’t happen. I just feel that it is over stated. And you coming in and feeling racially maligned by black people is interesting. I am wondering what your interaction is or was with those in that black community. How did they come about calling you these names? Not that I am saying it was right or OK for them to say anything like this to you or anyone else. I can’t stand that type of thing. I just don’t understand how it even comes about.

    I have seen people who move in to the black area where I am and they are totally out of place. They act fearful as if the people who look just like them are going to run up and just jack them right on the spot. I think that you did the right thing IF like you said, you came in without any preconceived notions etc. I just personally think that a lot of the people who are getting bothered in the black community might want to think about how they are interacting with folks.

    I didn’t grow up in a low income area. I have moved to a few different areas that would be considered low income, as an adult. And I think that the people in the area where I am and probably a lot of low income areas, are sensitive about being looked down on. It seems to me that if you are treating the people as equals or like you would people from anywhere “else”, people would have a lot less problems. But, hey, I am no expert on low income residents and what they think. But, my experiences in the places I have lived.

    And I can honestly say that the only time I have actually been robbed it was by a white man in an all white neighborhood, that was supposed to be safe according to the majority of people. So, I guess I can only come at people with my thoughts as well. But when we start speaking about how people think based solely on nothing more than the fact that they live in a poor area of town which is predominantly black, I have a problem with it. I just get extremely tired of people wanting to lay blame solely at the feet of the downtrodden based on nothing more than ignorance.

    If we are going to tell the tale of the black poor, and take them to task, then we have a lot more to do than just paint a picture of lazy folks as if this encompasses everyone there. I’m sorry, race is a large factor in this country still today. We don’t have double digits unemployment which is more than twice that of the white community by accident, or by being so extremely lazy. We need to be more responsible. People need to stop just spewing stereotypes and trying to pass it off as some sort of insightful look into the heart, soul and mind of poor black people.


  3. Excellent article theblacksentinel. But I must take exception. You said,

    “It is a shame when we have such hatred or disdain for our own community that we can’t even see that we have taken up the bell of the town crier.”

    I feel I must correct you. It is a shame when we have such hatred AND disdain for our own community. Too often, too many black people want to point to our neighbors who obviously chose to wallow in ignorance and we never realize that we wallow in our own ignorance, relying on nothing more than propaganda to cast a damning finger on black people while giving the dominant community a pass. It’s never the dominant community’s fault who established the system if discrimination and controls every facet of living. It’s black people! It’s a classic example of blaming the victim for the crime.


  4. Well, being just pretty damned white, I’m not going to wade into this blog telling you “I’m not racist, have black friends, blah blah, BLAH, ad naseum….”

    I’m sure you’ve heard it all before.
    To quote The Kinks, in the song ‘Black Messiah’:
    “White’s white
    Black’s black
    That’s that”

    I’m definately not a Rush Limbaugh fan.

    I’m more of a fan of the MLK jr, Ghandi, and real freedom fighters like them. I’d venture to say we have some similar social and political views.

    Anyway, you write well. I’ll visit back some.

  5. sekanblogger,

    Thanks and you as well. I enjoyed your site and will definitely visit again. And thank you for the visit.

  6. Overstated? Yes, I am a person of intense embellishment. I have a tendency to describe the simple striking of a match as a catastrophic forest fire.

    I’m not sure I understand how we racially deride each other either. When I moved into this area, I thought of it just like when I moved into the hundreds of other areas I’ve been to. I was a military kid, but we were overseas most of the time. I lived in Asia most of my life, then moved to a predominately Spanish neighbourhood in the U.S before I moved into the black community. I figured it would be just like getting to know the foreigners I had to get to know in order to survive living overseas. You stated that you think that “a lot of the people who are getting bothered in the black community might want to think about how they are interacting with folks.” What about the other way around? It goes both ways, I feel. I’m getting to know you, just as you’re getting to know me. Whether I “talk funny,” “dress funny,” or listen to “white music,” I’m still a black person. I’m still a part of the black community, am I not? Or have I made an erroneous assumption?
    I feel like, in my case, the minute I open my mouth, it’s a war. I speak very “cleanly” and I try very little to use slang because it sounds common. When I moved to the U.S., a lot of things were foreign to me. I never heard of BET. I didn’t know who Mary J. Blige was. I never saw a movie with black actors in it. I didn’t even do any of these things until I was in my mid-20s, when someone tried to “blackinize” me. (Their words, not mine.) I was given several black movies, some R&B and rap records and told not to come back until I was black. I’m always having to explain who I am. Why do I have to explain why I don’t like R&B? Why don’t you (not you, but *them*) have to explain why you do? Perhaps it comes down to personality as well. My closest friends describe me as aloof and standoffish (my upbringing and schooling), strongly opinionated and a person of intense convictions. This is not directed at black people, but all people. So maybe when I came to this all black community, they took it as a personal affront. I don’t know, and it is water under the bridge now. I ended up moving out of the neighbourhood and into an international neighbourhood where I felt more comfortable. But it seems every time I meet a black person, I always have to go on the defensive because I am the one who has to explain why I am, while they don’t have to explain why they aren’t.
    I do now feel threatened by your average black person. Before I moved here, I didn’t care one way or another about the race of person I dated. Now, I would not dream of dating a black man, much less marrying one. When I was in grade school, I DREAMED of dating a black man. I didn’t have that luxury back then, because the only one available was the guy with the crossed eyes and missing front teeth. When I got grown, I was so excited. Look at all these beautiful black men! But unfortunately, I have had disastrous black relationships, mainly because we had absolutely nothing in common except lust. Everything bad that has ever happened to me, was at the hands of a black person. When I started really looking into Black Americans (statistics), I was appalled. Why are we the most unemployed, living in crappy neighbourhoods, with high HIV/AIDS and low test scores? I had no idea this was the case. I thought all black people were just like my family, with some a little bit poorer and some a little bit richer. When I found this was not the case, I tried to figure out why this was. When I looked around me, the black people I met seemed to answer the question. Obviously, I’m not going to travel the country and find out who is and who isn’t, so I just based everything on this entire city. Perhaps this is wrong, but what can I do, really?
    I moved here with high expectations actually, but no pre-conceived notions because there was nobody around to base anything on. If anything, I should have thought black people are “better” than anybody because my mother (who is east Indian, black and white) is extremely racist. She is very uncomfortable with people who are not black. She had a hard time overseas because she felt she couldn’t “trust those people.” She warned my sister and I against bringing home non-black friends, which resulted in us not bringing any friends home at all. I always wanted a black girlfriend, so she could teach me how to do my hair. I always wanted a black boyfriend, because Asians don’t date outside their race, so in high school, I was just everybody’s tag-a-long. I do now have black girlfriends, but I am always painfully aware that I’m on the outside.
    I understand what you’re saying about race being a factor, but for me, I just cannot see that. Like I said before, to my knowledge, I’ve never been discriminated against in the U.S. I’ve always gotten everything I’ve ever wanted because I went out and got it. Nobody ever told me that I “wasn’t allowed” to do something; maybe that is the difference. Because I didn’t grow up with a notion that whites are up while blacks are down, I don’t feel like I’m trying to fight the tide. I applied to university, got into everyone I applied for. Then I went and got the job I wanted. I have never not gotten anything I wanted. It wasn’t easy, and neither was it handed to me, but I honestly believe it is because I have the power of education and PRESENTATION on my side. I present myself as a well-educated, well-spoken PERSON, as opposed to a well-educated, well-spoked BLACK person.
    I think I didn’t look down on my race until I moved here. I feel like my opinion has been solidified by what happened to my sister and brother. They are considerably younger than me (5 and 10 years younger), so the impact of living overseas didn’t stick as hard with them. When we moved back to the U.S., it was like everything my parents taught them was erased. My sister and brother are now perfect examples of what I stereotyped about the black community. My brother wants to be a rapper and my sister is an unmarried single parent with gold teeth. As my co-worker said, “They’re blackinized. What happened to you?”

  7. ischeherazade,

    First thing I noticed while reading your reply, is that you say you had no preconceived notions about blacks. But you clearly said earlier in the reply that you “thought” all blacks were just like your family. So right there you assumed that blacks were all middle class etc. You also say that you looked into the statistics and blacks were on the bottom for good things and on top for the bad. When did you also look into any of the causes or history of the black race in America which would give you some insight into their psyche.

    Also, you say that you have always wanted a black boyfriend and a black girlfriend so that she could show you how to do your hair. Did you ever have any wants for these so called friends besides lust and some sort of tutor? It sounds like you weren’t interested in being a friend as much as you just wanted something from these people. Could be that I am just misreading what you are saying. But, that is how it sounds.

    You also said that you were aloof and distant. Well don’t you think that those traits are probably not going to win you any friends? I mean, that right there coupled with the non use of slang as it “makes you sound common”, sound pretty problematic to me. I don’t care that much for slang myself, but would be loathe to say it makes people sound “common.” That sounds a bit like you weren’t going to make any friends. I mean you are dealing with common everyday folks who haven’t been outside the country let alone that neighborhood.

    So it seems to me that if you have been all over the world as you say and speak with a proper lilt. I don’t know if you have an accent of some kind, but it sounds like you don’t sound like the average everyday black person living in the town you were in. So I am sure that when you were in other foreign countries where you didn’t know the customs they asked you questions about where you were from etc. I am not from where I live and I speak extremely proper according to the people I am around and am constantly asked where I come from. And I don’t listen to any of the music stars you speak of and in fact don’t have very many if any black artists when I think of my favorite songs.

    But to me that is fine, as music is universal, or should be. I am sure that my taste in music raises eyebrows. And in fact the majority of the time as my family is driving around we are listening to news radio. And it probably gets attention from the folks who are used to the loud booming sounds of rap music blaring out of cars where I live. It doesn’t matter. I don’t know why one person attracts enough attention where as I don’t. I can’t say. I probably don’t have anything in common with the majority of people in my area except that we are black.

    Yet, it works. It is the same with my significant other. When I met him, I was living in an all white community and only saw another black lady when going to work. I was one of 3 minorities where I worked. One was an African lady and the other a Cambodian man. So, I know how hard it is to find a person who has a lot in common with you. Also, my significant other is just like me. A black person with a different taste in music and so on. We both like international travel and education. But, we both have an affinity for the black community. We are well suited for each other.

    And I guess we have the opposite going on. The worst things that have happened to me have been at the hands of someone in the white community. Also, my siblings are who they are. I hate to hear your coworker say these things about your siblings. I also know that gold teeth having unmarried women are NOT a byproduct of the black community. I know that I have lived near a lot of white women with gold (could have been yellow) teeth and were unmarried. I also, know a ton of white boys who wish to be the next white rapper. But, since you believe that somehow the black community caused this is wrong. Your siblings chose to follow what the media told them was cool or they were young and stupid (sorry).

    Also, I have gotten everything that I have wanted as well. And guess what, I did it in spite of racism that I have faced in my life. I have never applied for a job and interviewed and wasn’t offered the position. I am comfortable with my skills and that I am an extremely good at what I do. I also know that I am well spoken and educated which has nothing to do with my race whatsoever. I also understand that first and foremost to anything that can be said about me, I AM BLACK! In fact I am a BLACK WOMAN! I love it and know that the racism which has affected me in my life has done nothing but taught me extremely valuable lessons about how I had to proceed to my goals. The problem is that you and I have been able for one reason or another, to utilize our education to do what we needed to do. Not everyone black is so lucky.

    Not to mention, the lack of education or the lack of a good education can be seen as a factor in most of this. I know that the majority of the people I live around are completely ignorant to a lot of things I would think basic. A lot of them have not traveled and do not have a grasp on other cultures and other ways of life. When you are isolated, uneducated and poor, you are going to have very little in the way of opportunities to change that. And the older you become without a change the harder it will be to enact that change. That is why it is so hard for adult education classes to instill the education these older people need to be able to compete in the marketplace. This is a vastly larger problem that really needs to be dealt with.

    Thanks for the reply. I wish I could understand your loathing of black men and I guess women as well. I just couldn’t see myself dating or marrying a man who isn’t black. And trust me, I have dating many different races of men. But, have found that my black man understands me the best and we just fit. Good luck to you and your siblings. You never know, your brother could make it and your sister might turn her life around. As long as her children are healthy, happy and being educated, I say she is doing alright.

  8. The Engineer

    Well said, ischeherazade; very well said.

    I, too, suffer from the same problem. Quite often, I have someone say to me, “What the hell are doing in my country? Go back to where you come from! This is not your country! You speak English?” I have received such treatment from Caucasians, African Americans, and more recently, Hispanic Americans.

    I might answer with “The last time I checked, I spoke English. Are you trying to violate my Civil Rights?”

    That response usually leaves their mouths gaping open and silent — it is funny to see.

    America was, is, and will always be a compartmentalized culture. Whenever anybody meets anyone for the first time, inside the first 90 seconds, someone is going to ask questions to determine race, religion, political affiliation, financial status, sexual orientation, national status, etc — all despite the usual and expected code of niceties that we should not ask about those very subjects in polite company. I suppose America was, is, and will always be a culture of contradictions.

    It will take a lifetime to adjust, if ever.

    On the issue of finding a mate, I, too, have suffered the same problem. You may have spent your lifetime, so far, in the pursuit of finding a man like your father. I have spent my lifetime, so far, in the pursuit of finding woman like my mother (well, almost like my mother). Have we found success? Based upon your essay, I would conclude that we have not.

    What is the solution? The solution is to match congruent qualities. There must be close match between your personal characteristics and that of your prospective mate. Given our cultural upbringing and educational experiences, our solution may be the only one that, on the surface, may appear to be an treasonous abandonment of our respective peoples and cultures:

    Find a mate among the Caucasian Culture.

    All right. I said it, with the full expectation that I will punished as much as the Internet will allow. It is not my intent to be controversial, but rather, it is my intent to be helpful.

    I think some justification is in order:

    1. Women have biological clocks.

    What this means is that women should find a man — fast. What is the cutoff age for woman to find a mate? 25, 35, 45, 55? Well, to have children (without problems such as Down Syndrome), I would put that cutoff age somewhere between 25 and 35, with a slight favoritism toward 25. That cutoff age is so early, I believe a woman needs a lot of help to find someone by the time she is 25. If a woman’s parents cannot help provide a selection of prospective bachelors, then the woman is on her own to find a mate — this will be very tough to do, and tougher if she decides to limit the field.

    Some say that men have biological clocks too. Maybe so, but that clock is ticking at a much slower pace. I have spent half a lifetime in pursuing women (almost like my mother) with absolute, total, abject failure. The women I was pursuing belong to a group that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) in Atlanta, Georgia, USA, have just recently identified as having the highest suicide rate than that of any other demographic in the world. That would strongly suggest that such women are mentally ill. More recently, another study concluded that the same women have sexually transmitted diseases at four (4) times the rate of their respective men. Obviously, something is very wrong. The “writing is on the wall.” — I am wasting my time in that pursuit, and although I do not have a woman’s biological clock, I cannot wait until I am collecting Social Security before I find a mate; therefore, I will no longer place any limits on myself.

    2. Not all Caucasians are bad.

    Okay. A lot of them are bad, but not all of them. From my own experiences, I would provide the following Engineering numbers:

    3 out of 7: Are fine people who do not appear racist.
    2 out of 7: Are “fence walkers.”
    2 out of 7: Are just plain DANGEROUS.

    I would recommend to find someone from the first category. “Fence walkers” are somewhat easy to spot; they will act nice around Minorities, but if enough other Caucasians (dangerous ones) are present, “fence walkers” will switch sides and become dangerous too.
    The dangerous ones (e.g. bald, tattoed, sneering, flag waving, gun & knife toting, etc) are to be avoided.

    I think it is important to mention that if one were to find a mate among the Caucasians, one needs to draw a definite line: No support for Caucasian penchant for racism. I believe that, for couples comprising Non-Caucasians and Caucasians, the subject of racism would need to be discussed very early in the relationship.

    3. Find someone that just “fits” together with you.

    If someone shares the same tastes in music, morals, entertainment, education, etc, then choose that person; do not restrict yourself.

    You mentioned in your essay that your mother did not want you to bring home non-black friends. Well, is that not racist enculturation? My mother similarly imposed the same restriction on me (Well, almost: she wanted me to have Caucasian friends, but to find a wife who was like her — Talk about contradictions!).

    I spent my entire life pursuing women who basically and intrinsically hated me based on racism (a kind of perverted, reversed, self-inflicted, conflicted racism). Meanwhile, there were plenty of Caucasian women who were very interested in me. More recently, there have been African American women who were also very interested and some Hispanic women who displayed some interest. I spent my entire life pursuing a dead end.

    I am glad my biological clock is ticking slowly; I still have a chance, and I am no longer going to waste any more time.

    ischeherazade, I believe I am paraphrasing E.M. Forster: “We read to know we are not alone.”

    Thank you for listening.

  9. The Engineer,

    Thanks for that reply. I agree that if your only option is to go outside of racial lines and find love it is NOT a terrible thing. Like I will always say, if my mother had not gone outside the black community to find my father I would not be who I am. Anyhow, I find it problematic when a person just says that they will NOT seek love within their race and that is that. That to me is some sort of self hatred stuff that I can’t tolerate.

    I understand having an issue with the men who are black that have hurt you. But, I find it irresponsible to apply that hurt to every black man in existence because of a few. That is what causes the contagious shooting which kills innocent black men holding bags of groceries, candy bars and hair brushes. Cops claim that due to their fear of being shot by black men, they now are on the offensive and shooting first and asking questions later.

    Not only can we not tolerate that, we can’t tolerate our own doing the same thing in the love arena. If a person just wants to find love outside their race, fine, just don’t play the game of it’s only because black men treat me bad. That is a cop out and intellectually insincere. I have dated outside my race plenty and have no problem with that. I do, have a problem with people who seem to make it their ONLY preference based on nothing more than stereotyping.

    Now if you absolutely can’t find love within then of course you need to look without. There is no sense in being alone just for the sake of not looking culturally treasonous (nice term Engineer). I personally advocate finding love within, but I by no means try to place some sort of, this is all you should ever do, type of situation. I just don’t like the elimination of your own race as an option due to racist types of criteria. It is discrimination from within and I can’t agree with it.

    I hope that both you The Engineer and ischeherazade find what you are looking for and hopefully you will luck out like I did and find it with a black person. I would be the last person anyone would think would be compatible with what most people think of as a stereotypically black man. Simply because of my likes and dislikes. I don’t like what would be termed stereotypically black. And I don’t like pigeon holing people into that type of thing. I don’t like stereotypes of what blacks should or shouldn’t be like. That in itself is racist, no matter who is doing it.

    I found a man, who just like me, has varied and eclectic tastes in everything from music, movies to entertainment of all sorts. We value intelligence, travel and culture, and not just our own. So, those people are out there, they just have to be allowed to come into your lives. God, I feel like some sort of love counselor. LOL. I am only saying that you have to think outside the box. I had to set aside the things that I felt were important for love and find what would bring me true happiness. And if I found that this would have meant going outside the black race then so be it, that would have been where I went.

    Again, good luck to both of you.

  10. sekanblogger,

    I have been following that. Now that guy is really sipping the kook aid a bit hard. And might even need to go into rehab asap.

    Thanks for the link.

  11. The Engineer

    To The Black Sentinel:

    This comment is not relevant to the topic.

    Recently, there was a shooting spree at an Alabama university involving:

    Amy Bishop-Anderson, alleged shooter and Caucasian.

    Dr. Podila, killed, a dark skinned Indian.
    Dr. Davis, killed, an African-American.
    Dr. Johnson, killed, an African-American.

    It may not be a coincidence that all the dead are dark skinned.

    Perhaps, this terrible incident can inspire an essay from you.

    Thank you for listening.

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